Perdu

Lost. I feel as though I've been on a rollercoaster this last week, and especially this last weekend. I feel so completely lost and confused at times, that it seems difficult to breathe. But then, at other times, it seems that this point in my life is fine, and as it should be. I run into someone that talks about how long it took for them to find their job, or people at church talk about how long their kids have been looking for jobs. I talk to some of my friends that feel just as lost and confused as I am and it all suddenly seems normal.

On Sunday evening, after the church service, I was talking to a man who's son is about to start the job search. He asked how my inquiries were going and I almost gave him my stock response; that is, what I tell everyone at church, or in my extended family that asks that very same question, all the time. I usually say "oh it's going fine. I have my resume in at several places and am hopeful that someone will call any day now, and have been told that Schwan is about to contact me." While all of that statement is completely true, it really doesn't describe what I'm going through right now. I'm not sure if I was feeling particularly vulnerable, or realistic, or moved by the convicting sermon I'd just heard, but I decided to tell the man I was talking to exactly what was going through my mind at the moment. Dr. Richard Horner, the director of The Christian Study Center, and a person that I look up to and respect immensely once said, that when we allow people to see the messes in our lives, we allow them to see the areas in which God is working in our lives. Well, I looked the man square in the eye and allowed him to see my mess. I said "honestly, it's so frustrating and difficult that I just don't know what to do". And my directness was rewarded with perhaps the best encouragement I've gotten yet... he said "I know it's hard, but you know, I've known so many graduates that end up spending so much time doing something that has absolutely nothing to do with what their degree is in, and then one day BOOM, God puts them right where they are supposed to be and everything works out." I then said, "yeah, that's the part I'm waiting for, the boom!" And then he said, "just be patient, it'll happen, and I'll pray for you...I'll pray for a sonic boom!" It was really a simple discussion that took all of two minutes, but it has really stuck with me, and has encouraged me tremendously. So here's to waiting for a sonic booms....

I did get an email back from ZAO today. They said they weren't currently hiring, but that they would be happy to put my resume on file for future opportunities. It wasn't exactly the result I'd hoped for, but I was still glad to hear something from someone. I've gotten so frustrated waiting for everyone to contact me, that any contact at all was welcomed. And who knows, it could work out sometime down the line, it's just not in the plans right now.

My friend, Rob, posted a very enlightening speech on his blog that I think everyone should read, so check it out, I've added his link to my list. It's the post dated February 26, 2006.

As I mentioned in a comment on another post, Le Chien (Houdini) disappeared overnight, and hasn't been seen since. He was quite a bit smaller than Socrates and must have slipped out of the gate somehow. Hopefully he made it back home, or into a happy household that will treat him well.

Le Chien

The Dog. Today was an interesting and fairly busy day. I got up late, goofed around, got dressed, played with the kids my mom babysits, and finally made it to the gym. Today was the last weigh-in for The Greater Greenville Shrinkdown, a program my sister and I joined in order to lose some weight. I, surprisingly, lost another pound over the last two weeks. I wouldn't be terribly proud of that normally, but considering that I recently spent a week vacationing in Florida, where my best friend and I did a reunion tour of our favorite restaurants in Gainesville, one pound loss is actually great. That brings my total so far down to 8 pounds lost! Over the 8 week program, the 4,774 Greenville County participants lost a grand total of 12,080 pounds! An amazing success. My sister (J) and I later got our celebratory latte, with skim milk of course. We allow ourselves one each week that we are victorious. Before the reward, however, we had a very nice workout. We did resistance training focused on upper body, and then finished things off with a 30-minute brisk walk on the Treadmill.

While we were leaving the gym, Mom and Dad called to say they were headed to the mall, so we drove over and met them there. We did quite a bit of shopping. Me, Mom, and my sister bought new bathing suits to wear to the Y and J and I found a good deal at a shoe store for some leather slip on shoes. Mine are lilac. I'm sure they don't sound all that appealing, but they are actually quite cute. The are even cuter at $7.50, since they were already on sale, and then buy one get one half off. Dad got a gym bag, and we did some other browsing here and there. WE stopped and ate at Wendy's on the way home since it's one of very few restaurants open here at the late hour of 9:30 PM! That's one of the many things I miss about Gainesville. Long gone are the glorious nights when we could order pizza in the dorms at 3:30 AM.

Now I'll actually get around to talking about the title of this entry...the dog. When we got home I went out to make sure that Socrates, my Bassett Hound for those of you who don't know, had some food for the night. It was very dark outside as I walked out to his pen in the back yard. As I walked I thought I heard a jingling noise, so I stopped and my heart started to race, but then the noise stopped. Then I took a couple more steps, and definitely heard it again, so I looked around, and saw something as dark as a shadow move in the night. I jumped, and started to run when it dawned on me that what I was seeing was only a scared little dog. He turned out to be only little more than a puppy, and he was more afraid of me than I was of him. After talking to him in a soothing voice, and calling him, he finally timidly came up to me, wiggling frantically. He turned out to be a coal-black poodle. I think he's full-blooded, but I'm not sure. I was hopeful that I'd find his owner once I saw he was wearing a tag, but it turned out to just be a rabies tag. The only numbers on it belonged to a vet; I called the number and left a message in case they have the dog on record or something. In the mean time, I fed the poor little dog, that acted as if he hasn't seen food in quite some time, and put him out in the pen with Socrates. They seemed to be getting along well. I guess we'll have to figure out what to do with him in the next couple days. He's really cute and seems to be well mannered, I think he has even been taught to sit. Anyone want a cute, black, poodle?

On a financial note...I requested a deferrment on my student loans today. I will find out in 3-5 business days whether the proposal was accepted or not. I really hated doing that, I would like to get paying them so that I can get them paid off sooner, but I just can't afford them right now. Hopefully I will get a job soon, and be able to get paying, but I guess I've got the rest of my life for bills...

Les Jeux Olympiques

The Olympics. Since returning from Gainesville, I've been watching alot of the Olympic games. I love watching both the Summer and Winter Olympic games. I always find it amazing how fast I can get into a bunch of random sports that I never knew existed before seeing it on NBC. I find myself watching Ski Jumping, a variety of Slaloms, Bobsledding, Speed Skating, Ice Hockey, Figure Skating, Free-Style Skiing, and for a few hours today even Curling. I was entranced as Sweden took on Switzerland in the Women's Curling gold-medal match earlier this afternoon. I didn't even know any of the rules or strategies when I stopped in the middle of my room as the announcer's voice rose in excitement as the Swedish team first gained a two point lead over the Switzerland team. Before long, however, after sitting and watching, I found myself yelling at my ceiling-mounted television. I was aggravated at the Swedes for not "gaurding" when I thought they should have. I held my breath when they brushed the final "stone" into place in the 11th End, which I discovered is overtime in the interesting sport of Curling. I went from knowing nothing about the sport, to being a fanatic that yells at the t.v. and nervously awaits the outcome, as if it really mattered to me whether it was the Swedes or the Swiss that took home the gold. (It was the Swedes, 7-6 in overtime, for anyone that cares)

Tonight, my family watched the second half of the Women's Figure Skating long program, and once again I was overwhelmed at how wrapped up in the event we all got. You hear all the touching and dramatic back-stories, and watch clips of practices and interviews, and immediately get your favorite skaters. I, of course, rooted for leading American, Sasha Cohan, but also got very excited about Russian, Irina Slutskaya, a name that I can now say quite well. I held my breath as she performed her routine, and nearly cried when she stumbled on a landing. I did think that Japanese skater, Shizuka Arakawa, skated a very nice and clean program. Although it wasn't as entertaining, it was technically better. Even as I write such a paragraph, it strikes me as odd. I have gone ice skating a grand total of twice in my life. I do well to stand up and creep along the outside wall without falling. Sasha Cohan is known for her soaring balancing acts, and Irina Slutskaya for her powerful, awe-inspiring jumps, I am known for my clumsy belly-flop! I think the Olympics are great, if for no other reason than the exposure they give to sports that rarely take center stage on ESPN. I love the fact that I can be, or at least sound, like an expert on so many different sports for a couple weeks. I'm sure I've gone on about this much longer than anyone else cares about, but I just found it to be such a strange phenomenon that I had to write about it. Any other Couch Olympians out there? I'd love to hear your thoughts on the winter games.

On the job front...we went to Lowe's today to get some flourescent lights and I saw they were hiring, so I applied online tonight. It's hardly the career job I want, but it'll pay the bills, and it beats cleaning house!

L'eau

Water. I've recently heard about plans for a new bottled water company named ZAO. According to their website, which I've added as a link, ZAO means "to live" I'm assuming in some African language since that is the focus of the company. The company is just starting up and is non-profit. The plan is to bottle and sell clean water here, in The United States, and then 100% of the profits will fund water restoration efforts in Africa. They dig new wells, capture natural springs, build latrines, and educate the locals on hygiene.

My excitement about this new company exists on two levels. First of all, I think it is a great strategy to combat poor sanitation and disease conditions in impoverished areas, while generating profit in the US from bottled water sales. I will be much happier paying for water when I know it's benefitting people, and not just padding people's wallets. It has always astounded me in my Microbiology classes to learn that the diseases and problems people in 3rd-world countries suffer from in this modern age, when most of them could be solved by altering hygiene habits. What a great thing it would be to help provide good, clean water.

Secondly, I am excited at the possibility of employment with this company. I could be making a much bigger deal of this aspect than actually exists, but it's fun to dream. I was able to find out that the bottling plant is being built in Moravian Falls, NC, only 2 hours and 22 minutes from my home in Greer, SC. I don't even know if they are going to do any hiring, but I'm certain they will need at least one Microbiologist. I think it would be great to be able to work at such a job that will allow me to combine my education, Christian beliefs, and heart for missions. I emailed them to find out any more information on job opportunities. They haven't gotten back to me yet, so I'll just have to add it to my list of things to be patient for :-) Even if that job isn't an option, it has given me a new field to look at. The field of Microbiology can be a very large one, so it always helps to narrow your focus. And at the very least, I look forward to being able to purchase water from ZAO so that I can be even a small part in such a great work.

Bienvenue

Welcome to my new blog, Au Carrefour. The title, for you non-Francophiles, means "at the crossroads" in French. I chose that title because at this point in my life some paths are diverging, others are just beginning to appear, and still others are coming to a dead end. I recently graduated from the University of Florida with a Bachelor's in Microbiology and Cell Science, am now living at home in South Carolina, and am seeking employment. I feel as though I've been thrown, head-first out into the wide wide world. It's cold, confusing, and scary, but it is also exciting, and it is at this place that I feel I am able, like never before, to shape my life and future into what I want it to be. Now the only problem is to decide what that will look like. Which paths will take me to my destination, and which will stop short? Which job will I work at next? What new friends await just around the bend? I stand now, at the intersection, peer down the roads, and imagine the possibilities. I invite you to journey with me, as I develop a new life for myself. Feel free to comment, encourage, discourage, debate, cheer, or whatever, as you see fit.